Black Leather Pants - Mansion 99 (Rated R) Still Talkin' About the Hair!!!

Hey all! Found some tidbits for ya....ready to GO HOME! (10 more minutes!)

From the CB: Watch The Insider tonight...Clay won the poll!

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Hooray! Clay is the favorite all time idol on INSIDER today!

Also from laughnoutloud @ CV:

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Morning Adventures of Jennifer and Clay

Friday, May 25, 2007

Waking to the sound of papers being rustled nearby, Clay opens one eye. Split seconds later, he sits bolt upright with eyes as wide as saucers and watches Jennifer.

C: “What in the Good Lord’s name are you doing, Jennifer, and do you mind if I ask what my new fire pit is doing sitting in the middle of my bedroom?”

J: “Gathering”

C: “Gathering? Gathering what?”

J: “Let’s see. I think this paper is the petition you went door-to-door to get all your neighbors to sign to have Jericho moved from CBS to the TNT network -- or, as you put it, ‘From the Can’t Believe they’re this Stupid network to the This Network is for Thinkers.' By the way, the Mendlesons called to thank you for singing that lullaby to their new little baby girl to get her to sleep while you were there. They said they hadn’t had any time alone together since she was born, and Mr. Mendleson said he especially thanks you -- to the point that he vowed to play A Thousand Different Ways at the construction site where he works even if he gets the crap beat out of him. *pulls out more papers* This looks to be the 30-page dissertation you sent to the producers advancing the theory that if they bring Jericho back, the world would be a better place to live. *reads over it* I especially liked section sixteen, paragraph four when you explained that you would have more time for your different humanitarian works if you weren't sitting at home organizing campaigns to bring back the show. *throws papers down and drags over a burlap bag* And, as you know, this is the 15-lb bag of peanuts you intend to send the network executives with the note inside saying, ‘You’re Nuts!’ *picks up notebook* Last, but not least, here are the fifteen new songs you’ve written about love lost and lost love and the promise of hope and all that other sappy stuff inspired by the show’s cancellation. There. I think that’s all of it.

*places everything in fire pit and pulls candle lighter from pocket*

C: “Jennifer, you’re scaring me. What are you doing fiddling with my Luminere?’

J: “First of all, I’m not going to touch your Luminere! But I do intend to burn all of your crap with this lighter. This is payback, Clay Aiken. I warned you.”

C: *voice two octaves away from breaking glass* “Warned me about what?!”

J: “I warned you not to scare me anymore. You know how I hate creepy crawly things! *stamps foot* I didn’t mind you floating Guillermo’s moustache in my bowl of Cheerios the other morning because you agreed to clean up the mess …”

C: *bites lip not to snicker* “And I did”

J: “And I survived you tying that fishing line to the end of that disgusting thing and dragging it across my foot under my office desk even though it took me an hour to reorganize my papers and…”

C: *muffled laughter* “You’re killing me here, Jen.”

J: “…and I had to change my pants and…”

C: *chokes back cackle*

J: “But this is uncalled-for!!”

C: *wipes tear from eye* “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Jen, but…”

J: “No buts! You want to see Armageddon? Watch this!” *gets ready to torch the mess*

C: “Wait! Wait!! *jumps out of bed and grabs lighter out of Jennifer’s hand*

J: “You’re right; fire might not destroy everything. *walks over and opens door to hallway* "Durham!! Come here, boy!! I have some nice papers for you to play with!!!!”

C: “I’m sorry! Really, I am. You know how I love to joke around.”

J: “Yeah, but this last one was too much!!!”

C: “You’re not gonna hit me, are ya? You know how I bruise.” *eyes Jennifer carefully* “What last one are you talking about?”

J: “You know, the one in the shower just now. Didn’t you notice that my hair’s dripping wet?”

C: “Well, actually I think I was too terrified by the impending fire to notice, but honestly, Jen, my moustache is right here. Look” *pulls open desk drawer and holds up moustache*

J: *starts running around in circles* “Ew, ew, ew,ew, ew, ew…”

C: “What’s the matter now?”

J: “If your mustache is in here, then what’s that black fuzzy thing sitting next to the faucet in my shower??!?”

C: “S’ok, Jen. You put back my papers all nice and proper, and I’ll go kill that nasty 'ol moustache.”

J: “Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew….”

tune in next time for more adventures of Jennifer and Clay