Frankly My Dear, I Don't Give a Damn

[Pamela]

FRANKLY MY DEAR, I DON’T GIVE A DAMN

Oh my goodness y’all. Did you know that Clay really has limp hair?!?  I am so disappointed I can barely type. And did you know that he actually became a multi platinum selling recording artist even though he was only the runner up on American Idol?!? He didn’t even win!  Holy crap!  I am rending my garments over this as we speak.  

Are you aware that he is….dare I say….geeky?!? And pasty? And effeminate?  By his own admission!  He even wrote a book. At 25, the nerve!  It somehow landed on the NY Times bestseller list for non-fiction. And then there was that picture.  You know the one. Can you believe that?!? It had to be fake! Clay would never, ever touch a girl!   HAHA!  Please….

He is soooo manufactured.  Just like every other successful recording artist who started on TV instead of some smoke filled, booze drenched, sticky floored music hall.  He didn’t pay his dues either. Never mind that American Idol itself should be considered dues paying; and those local groups and the NC Music Connection and the JCC Country Showcase and the Pieces of Gold show and the Gospelfest and the Raleigh Boychoir (deep breath) and the demo tape and demo CD and the local beauty pageants and talent shows. (exhales)  

Sometimes he sounds like a girl when singing.  It’s true, he can hit notes most men (and some women) singers cannot even name.  And, he sometimes yells at people. OK, so maybe they did break the rules and flash him in the face with their cameras after being told not to. And maybe they did forget to turn his mic on for his very first solo in the concert in Chicago. Perhaps he really does just prefer Pepsi to Coke. It was a simple request, and by the way what part of Pepsi didn’t that person understand?!?  Pepsi was born in NC by the way!

He’s a diva, he’s pissy, he’s a control freak, he’s got to be in charge. If he is, so what?  So he’s a perfectionist, so what?  He’s an artist, and we all know how tempermental they can sometimes be. Heck, if I had to put up with the crap he puts up with I would be a raging lunatic. He’s pulled in every direction much of the time. He has a lot of pressure on him to perform, to be the perfect friend, the perfect son, the perfect artist, the perfect “boyfriend” to all of us.  (What, not all?  OK, most. LOL) To sing every single freaking note on pitch every single time, to be cute, and have perfect hair, and wear perfect clothes and be snarky and passionate and sincere and open and friendly with every single fan and critic alike.

Never mind the management, the booking agents, the security, the lawyers, the record company. We are demanding too. We want our glory notes, our eye…”hugs,” our lip bites and our driving moves. We want our knee bends and our winks and our jazz hands.  We want all of him. Everything. And most of the time, we get it.  He gives it to us, exactly what we want, exactly how we want it.  Is there anyone else in our lives who does that for us?  Maybe, but doubtful.

We get Clay the singer, Clay the comedian, Clay the role model, Clay the sex symbol.  We get Clay the writer, Clay the humanitarian, Clay the teacher, Clay the entertainer, Clay the real, live, person.  He is a real person. A human being with real feelings.  So I can only imagine how reading some of the things that are written and said about him by gossip columnists, tabloids, journalists, critics, late night talk show hosts and even fans of other American Idols must hurt, even though I doubt he would ever show it publicly.

And sometimes, when we read those things, it hurts our feelings too.  Because when they insult Clay, they are insulting us.

I’ve decided I’m not going to let “them” have any control over my feelings any longer. They will no longer have the power to push my buttons, yank my chain or fire me up.  If someone writes or says something stupid about Clay, I may still get ticked off.  But I won’t be writing to any so called journalist or comedian who has nasty things to say about Clay.  I'm above it, and I'm above them. It serves no purpose except to give them all a jolly good laugh and yet another column about Clay’s over zealous fans.  

Besides, I don’t care what “they” think. Who are “they?” "They" are no one to me.

All I have to know is that Clay sings like an angel, he’s a cutie and most of all, he tries. His halo is crooked, he said so himself. But he never fails to always try to do the right thing, to say the right thing, to give us what we want, to put others first. He tries. And that is so much more than most people do. His heart is full and his talent is immense.  

He is one of the good guys.

So write whatever you want to journalists and critics. Frankly, I don’t give a damn.

I love what Clay Aiken does, and what he stands for. He rocks my world.
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Copyright 2005. Printed with the permission of the writer.

[shannan_lynn]

Hi, I am Shannan from Ohio. I really enjoyed reading your little artical .I thought it was very honest and truthful. A person really has to want it bad to be a performer and to be perfect day after day. I love to sing and do so at my church,but to learn to be perfect all the time and alway hit the notes everynight. I guess that is where good voice coaching come in . I would guess it woould be a lot of hard work but worth it .
On the Flip side Clay is a person like us all ,and is allowed to act like one.It would be nice if Clay would read what you wrote to know that people do get the whole picture.

[outthereforclay]

So...."just a fan", eh?

I think not.

What you've done is qutie clearly and rationally presented just about every possible reason to love Clay Aiken---to admire and respect him, value and treasure him, be grateful to and for him and be loyal to him.

Succinctly, you have presented a perfect argument for taking Clay's example of courage and self esteem as a model for ourselves---as his fans, for sure, and as people.

I, too, have become less and less concerned when I read a negative or even hurtful or cruel attack on Clay Aiken, the performer or man. He has in this very short time proved himself over and over again by his actions (or non-actions), his words that he then lives, and his tireless and consistent advocacy of love and love.

If given a choice of whom to believe---Clay or the critics---I choose Clay.

Interesting. Today in my Weight Watchers' class, the leader said something at the very end that was so simple, yet so true...and, as is often the case these days, it made me think of Clay and his journey that we're so lucky to be a part of.

She was talking about how some "friends" change when a person has a lot of success with their goal to get healthier and fitter and, in the process, look better. How those "friends" will say hurtful or rude things. And she said that when that happens to her now, she says, "You know, it's GOOD to have an opinion! But I just need to let you know something. Your opinion of me will never, EVER be more important than my OWN opinion of me!"

That just seemed so simple, yet it seemed that it is exactly what Clay has been able to live by. I love him for that. In his book he says, "Still, I survived. And I kept singing. And in time, other people listened." And that's what he's still doing.

Thank you, for this thought-provoking lesson.

[JanWhatever]

If I could fly through the internet and burst through your computer monitor I would give you a great big wet kiss!  You said it all and you said it perfectly! BRAVO!!

[DixLuvsCA]

Thank you, thank you, thank you!! "WHAT YOU SAID"  My heart feels better now!!

Love, Dixie

[claylon]

Thanks Pamela, that was AWESOME, had me in tears. I too feel so upset at people saying things about Clay, he just does not deserve any of it. Have you noticed? how often it is people, who havnt even given him 5 minutes of their time. How dumb is that? They make judgments on one picture, or half a song, or whatever. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but it has to be based on an unbiased research of the subject first.

I live in Cape Town S. Africa, and am a huge Clay fan,  being a Clay fan anywhere, is not easy, because of the above type of people. Here in South Africa nobody knows Clay, so it is even worse. I am lucky not to be in a straight jacket and locked up. It is that bad. I am an "Idol Worshiper" ect ect, just because I happen to love a wonder ful young man that happened to be on A Idol. Please!!!!!!!  How can anything good come off that show??????How biased. God has an incredible way of putting people and things in the most unexpected places.

What is most important, and what I loved about your post is, we fans are the ones who must accept Clay unconditionaly, and lift him up, to where he belongs, at the top, he is that awesome!!!!. You hit the nail on the head. HE CANNOT PLEASE ALL OF US ALL THE TIME. Let him make the choices and support him no matter what. Some so called fans can be cruel as well, and this hurts me the most. Think about what you are saying, as this affects Clay, his fans, and even people all round the world you are, and could be potential fans. We need to stand together and support him.
Thanks again, You are the type of fan CLAY deserves. As he said "THE BEST "fans in the world. Let us ALL be like this!

Maylon (Claylon(g) )
God Bless !!! Clay, he is in my prays daily( in fact more ) as I for one want him around and singing for me forever.

[sylvie]

Thanks so much for saying all the things I've been thinking for so long.  I sometimes get upset by things that are said by journalists but from now on I am going to try to emulate Clay and "just let it roll off".  Frankly my dear I don't know how some of these people ever got their jobs in the first place.  They are either completely useless because they don't do their research on Clay or they are completely jealous - as a lot of men tend to be when they really can't comprehend how women are so attracted to a particular guy.  The reasons we are attracted are beautifully set out in your piece.  He will always have his critics of course, and he should have, Clay himself knows he's not perfect,  but I hope that one day they understand better the reasons that we love him.

[Shiney]

 Alright you go girl!  You got it right on the money!  All the negative vibes from Clay's critics mean nothing to me either cuz they ARE NO ONE to me or Clay!  I'm human and I do get a bit hot and bothered when these unqualified so-called professionals attempt to defame him.  In the end, Clay will be laughing all the way to the bank with us fans opening the door. And one day years and years from now Clay'll be laughing in heaven too!  God will be listening to Clay's beautiful music! Thanks for the revelation!  

[mrsaiken5230]

wow that was so inspiring!!   it made me feel all bouncy inside!! haha

[Katy4Clay~Orlando Claymat]

When anyone criticizes our man, I think, WOW, he has really arrived!  He's got the attention of the American public!  The 'spoofs' (next to the leader of the Free World's spoof, by the way), articles in the rags that are trying to sell their stuff at the check-out counters, are there because CLAY SELLS!  They are certainly aware of him, and of the CLAY NATION!  We have accomplished our goal.  Even negative publicity, is still puplicity!  Might as well bring it on, because it goes with the turf!!  We (nor can he) take it to heart and let it bother us!  If 'they' are talking, it's a good thing.  There's no way, no matter what he does, that he's NOT going to come under this sort of thing.

LOVE YOU CLAY!  We will all try to grow a thick skin, so we can just move on if we hear or read something that upsets us.

Katy4Clay~Orlando Claymates

[winddtalker]

PAMELA!!!

Thank you so much for your article. It says everything we all think, but don't know how to say.

I, too,  when Clay was a budding artist, used to fret and stew over every nasty remark, or negative comment. I was devasted when he did not win that show thing.   Thank the dear Lord for that. I used to worry that his records wouldn't sell, his concerts wouldn't sell, he would get sick.  Why didn't they play him on the radio? However with the garbage they play on the radio, I am not surprised to be honest.  But I still worried.  Goodness, you would think I was his mother.

But now I am so over it.  I think most of it stopped for me the day he was on the Diane Sawyer show when his album sold 613,000 the first week and shipped double platinum. All I knew was he had arrived.  The public had spoken.  He had to be so proud that day. But most  important to me, he would be around...and keep on SINGING!!

From time to time after that, I still worried about him a little.  Like is he working too hard, is he happy, did his concert sell out?......... but even that has stopped.

Clay is so OKAY.  He holds his own with any of them.  No one, and I mean no one, needs to worry about this talented young man.  His musical talent just gets better and better.  And his VOICE is singing more than music, in his work with the children and less fortunate in our world. Thank you Mr. Ambassador for ALL you do.  The world's a better place with you in it, oh baby, that's a fact.

So let the nay sayers babble all they want.  Frankly Pamela.....WHO DOES GIVE A DAMN?  Thank you girl.  You said it all, and I admire you for your ability to speak it so clearly.

Windtalker
The Clackhouse

[Anonymous]

Your post got me feeling kind of misty.  It was great, so starkly candid, and true.  After reading some of the other posts, I couldn't add much more to it, but immediately, it made me think of a song written by Smokey Robinson.  See if you agree with the parallel for the way we feel about Clay. If you've never heard it, well, I think it's a great song.

It would be easier to take the wet from water or the dry from sand
Than for anyone to try to separate us or stop us from holding hands, 'cause...                                                  
CHORUS:
I love you, I love you from the bottom of my heart
And what love has joined together, what love has joined together
Can nobody take it apart
It would be easier to take the cold from the snow or the heat from fire
Than for anyone to take my love from you
'cause you're my heart's desire, &...
(chorus)
Even if they separate us 1000 miles apart
We will still be together in each other's hearts
It would be easier to change all the seasons of the year
Than for anyone to change the way I feel about you; I love you dear

[Cezannnne]

I am Cezanne.  I wrote the post about this essay.

[karoljd]

I usually just lurk....but here I am, in the flesh, so to speak.  I have to tell you that you are saying what most of us think.  I also know that if OMC was NOT such a phenomena......He wouldn't get ANY kind of attention.  These people are not stupid...they know that any mention of Clay will get THEM attention.  I say--our best response is no response...Have a great day everyone!

[eirrek notrab]

I'd like to add just one little thing, with all the love held for this man, do him one favor.  If you see him walking down the street, eating in a restaurant or shopping.... walk on by.  He has so little freedom these days.  If you see him just out and about, let him alone.  Show your love for him by letting him have his space.  He already gives so much, lets let him keep something for himself.  Love you all.  Eirrek

[aikenfan627]

Group Hug for All my fellow Clay fans.  Couldn't have said it better myself.  I am constantly amazed by how humble Clay is.  It's like he doesn't realize we think he's perfect just the way he is.  Yet another reason to love him.  :love2

[clays#1fan]

Bravo 3 cheers for you!! You said it all honey!!       Great Job!  

[ElizabethAR]

Finally there is somone who can put into words beautifully what most of us try to say every day!  Thank you!  I feel that now I can hold my head up high because there are so many people out there willing to argue for Clay.  Until now, I never really realized how much work he has an how little time he has for sleep!  By the way, what picture may that be?

[Her]

I love Clay Aiken, he rocks my world.