THE SOAP BOX - GET YOUR RANT ON!

[totallyinluv]

It is an amazing phenomenon - the impact that this special young man has on so many of us.  He does make us feel good.  He does make us want to be better people.  He does just make us happy.  He makes many of us wish that we were in our 20s again and had a chance to have a more intimate relationship with him because he is SO sexy and adorable.  We are thrilled to have someone in the pop music world like him right now and want to do everything in our power to support him.

As far as being a respectful fan and what you would or wouldn't do if you encountered him, I hate the idea of people being physically intrusive to him. I recently read about a woman at the Hurricanes Game in one of the special box seats who stuck her nose in his neck and smelled him - now that is intrusive!   I worry that he will withdraw and begin to become more and more distant from his fans.  I never could have imagined myself being aggresive as a fan with him.  But when I found myself standing at the Red Carpet at the AMAs and there he was 10 feet in front of me and there was nothing between me and him, I just couldn't stand there!  So I followed him in and walked behind him up the Red Carpet inside the Schrine.  I never touched him and came close to just letting him walk away before I got up the guts to say," Clay!", and then after he turned around, "I love you.".  I would never have touched him or asked anything of him at that moment.  But it was such a unique situation that I told myself if I let him just walk away and didn't say anything to him I'd never forgive myself.  And I'm glad that I put myself out there.  It was such a positive interaction, and I didn't feel that I intruded into his personal space - he could have just smiled and walked away and I would have been thrilled to get a smile.  It was his choice to respond the way he did and bend down and kiss me on the cheek.  I think there is a difference between letting Clay be giving to his fans and imposing ourselves on him intrusively.  Clay does really love and appreciate his fans and wants to give back to them.  And most of us will let him do that without jumping all over him.

[Anita]

He represents the best a man can be, the best a human being can be. We are sooo hungry for that, we just leapt all over him. No, he's not perfect -- who the heck would want to be around a perfect person - yuck! He is more fun because of his imperfections

.

liney23 between Pam and you my thoughts and feelings have been expressed. I agree, no matter how different all of us are ,Clay's voice and personality brings us together, "we were hungry for that"

[Anonymous]

Pamela: thanks for your essay.  This thread is leading to some interesting discussion.

Being from Canada, I could never vote for him so it certainly isn't that my votes helped get him there so I have a stake in it that explains it.  What surprised me the most was my reaction after AI was over during the summer.  I was watching Entertainment shows, hoping that they would mention him, looking for mentions of him in the entertainment section of the paper and buying any magasines that mentioned him and just feeling sooo thrilled and happy when I found Clay!!!  I went to different stores, looking for his single that first week and was disappointed that it wasn't shipped yet and so happy when I found itl  I didn't see him in concert but it was this searching for Clay that was so not me.  Towards the end of the summer, I found some concert reviews and read them on the internet and started to explore the internet community a bit.

I remember reading his Coming Appearances at this site at the beginning of September and then not returning for a week only to find out I had missed his appearance on Oprah again.  (The original and the rerun).  Again, what surprised me was how upset and disappointed that I felt.  Why should it matter so much?  So I knew I had to keep coming here to stay up to date and Pamela joined and does such a marvelous job of doing that.  Of course I know have full blown uncurable OCD and enjoy the company of everyone on this site.  It just makes me feel good.

I have a friend that I have started yapping about Clay a lot to and I like how she put it.  It gives me a nice place for my mind to wander to. :D
Even though I am in my forties, married with two children, I like to listen to his music, watch him on TV and let my mind wander.

I think that one problem with fans is when they want to take instead of give and do things that are scary to Clay or anyone that it happens to.  I wouldn't want anyone jumping on the hood of my car or invading my personal space or making me feel scared for my safety or the safety of those around me.  When those kinds of things happen to Clay, I bet he has the same kind of reaction as anyone else would; probably scared and/or annoyed.  Also working with children and people with disabilities, Clay has learned to ask permission if he can give a hug and I have read on the different Meet and Greet reports with people with disabilities that he has done just that.  If the lady wants to smell him, she can ask for permission and then it is Clay's choice.

Totallyinluv -- you approached him when he was working. (An award show is part of the job.)  You gave him some love.  You didn't try to take from him or maul him or touch him and that probably wasn't the best time to ask for an autograph either which you didn't.  Clay was able to choose to give to you.  I think that makes a heck of a difference.  (The comment from your husband didn't hurt either. :

I think respect and appropriateness matter too.  If we met our children's teacher in the mall, we might smile, say hi but that is not the time to talk about how our child is doing in math.  If I saw Clay in a restaurant (which is soooo unlikely to happen up here) I certainly wouldn't approach him when he was eating but if the opportunity presented itself to unobtrusively make eye contact, smile and say or mouth, "hi" I might.  I really wouldn't want to bug him if he is not working so I don't know.

Anyway, now that he is 25, I feel a bit better about it because 25 rounds up to 30 so he is not such a kid anymore :

Thanks,  
Playingclay

[Anonymous]

Liney23 pretty well summed it up for me.....there's so many reasons to love Clay.  We were all taken by his voice (the first time I heard it my mouth fell open & I got chills down my spine!)  The chance to watch his transformation and growth into a first class entertainer was awesome.  I suspect we all had dreams of being famous actors or singers at some point it our lives, so watching Clay has been almost as much of a journey for us as it has been for him.  He is not only living the American Dream, but he is living it with grace & humility.  It has been a long time since there has been such a good role model.  Whatever "it" is, Clay has it in abundance!

[CFCF]

I've thought from the beginning that just a little bit of this phenomenon is "the woman scorned" syndrome, for both men and women. Clay wouldn't let us go after the AI producers for the gross misjudgement that many of us perceived (whther it was or not) :P So we proved the real winner the only other way that would make people sit up and pay attention.
   I also love him for the pleasure I get from hearing him sing and watching him perform. He is one of the most joyous performers I've ever seen. He has the most beautiful glow when he sings, he just seems so HAPPY! It feels good, Pam is so right. The only time I've ever seen him perform without it was at the Billboard awards, and I was so embarrassed for him at what was passing as entertainment (that horrid dog) that you can hardly blame him.
   And finally, I LOVE that he sets such a terrific example for my two children. He has never done or said anything publicly that I had to tell my children they weren't allowed to say or do, and that says a lot. He does wonderful things all the time that show people the RIGHT way to be. I just love that.
   I have his "little Drummer Boy" with Bing Crosby playing on continous loop right now as I type and browse. It is one of the most beautiful renditions of any song that I can think of, and I try to restore my self by listening to it at least 5 or 6 times a week.  
   It feels so good to have others in the same place emotionally as me. My hubby is a Ruben fan and so doesnt get why the kids and I love Clay so much :D
   May he set a fine example fot many years to come and provide us with many more years of beauty with his voice and charisma.

[Jan]

JUST RE READ THIS THREAD AGAIN.

IT SEEMS THAT THE GLUE THAT HOLDS US TOGETHER IS NOT; CAN HE SING, IS HE SEXY, IS HE GOOD LOOKING, ETC.
 BUT IT IS THE RESPECT FOR WHAT HE DOES AND WHO HE IS.

WHEN I READ ABOUT HIS BUBEL-AIKEN FOUNDATION, WHEN I READ OF HIS HIGH MORAL GROUND, WHEN I SEE CLIPS OF HIM IN WASHINGTON RALLYING FOR EDUCATION INSTEAD OF PARTYING WITH THE REST, THEN I SWELL WITH PRIDE THAT HE IS SUCH A WONDERFUL EXAMPLE TO US ALL.
 ONLY WISH ALL OF THE MUSIC INDUSTRY WOULD THINK OF HIM AS A GREAT BIG PLUS TO THE MUSIC BUSINESS.

HE REALLY BRINGS HOPE TO US.

GOD BLESS OUR CLAY!!!!

AND YES, I WOULD LOVE TO MEET HIM, TELL HIM HOW MUCH I ADMIRE HIM AS A PERSON AND GO MY WAY.

JAN

OF COURSE I MIGHT BE IN A DAZE FOR AWHILE!!!!!

[liney23]

Pamela, I will try to answer your query from my point of view.  I could care less if I ever get Clay's autograph or a picture of us together, but I would love some time to talk to him and have spent time imagining the occasion.  

This is such a crazy world he has gotten himself into - fandom-wise.  It is not just singing, but so much more.  I worry that he may run from the whole package because of the crazies.  

I would like to make sure he knows how he has impacted my life in such a positive way and that he has positively impacted the lives of others that I know.  I would like to make sure he understands that he is making a BIG difference, especially in the area of special needs children.  I would love to let him know that I am using him as a role model for my fatherless, 12-year old grandson and that is so important to me.  

I guess I would like reasurrence from him that he believe the positives outweighs the negatives of being such a big star and that he won't quit anytime in my lifetime.

Realistically, I know that having that much time with him won't happen.  I truely don't care about autographs or pictures, but I really would at least like his eyes to meet mine and for him to see the pure, appreciative love I hold for him in my eyes.

[barb0074clay]

perfectmatch:  I was the last "guest" to post (I thought I was registered already) so if you were talking to me, thanks for the compliment.  Although I am definitely one of you guys I don't post very often, but this subject was too compelling not too.  So many times I have tried to figure out the Clay phenomena and why I'm so "goofy" over him, but apparently, I'm not alone!  That's one reason I love this site.
Pamela"  I'm like you, I don't think I really want to meet Clay.  I tend to be shy in new situations and I know I'd be so tongue-tied I'd just embarass myself.  But, oh how I'd love to see a live performance!!

[liney23]

People Mag said in their review of Soulful this last week that Soulful outsold MOAM.  They meant just that week, but didn't say that.  I was soooo mad when People said that in such a way as to make the readers think that Clay's CD wasn't doing as well as Ruben's.  

They actually compared Kelly-Justin CD sales with Ruben-Clay sales, which is no comparison at all, since Justin bombed big time, poor guy.  They just made it seem like Clay wasn't doing well, when we know differently.  

Overall sales, MOAM has sold 2 million in less than 3 months.  Let's see Soulful do that......  Let's just say that I will be very shocked if it does.

I think Ruben will be successful, but to make it sound like he's selling better than Clay makes me a bit mad.

Grrrr...........

[Pamela]

People Mag said in their review of Soulful this last week that Soulful outsold MOAM.  They meant just that week, but didn't say that.

Ah yes liney, another case of 'selective editing.'  
Before Clay, I had grown somewhat complacent in my acceptance of journalistic integrity.  With the exception of Fox News  8) I thought most news organizations were fairly above board and objective.

But ever since the p*ta fiasco a few weeks ago, I am now questioning and second guessing almost everything I see, hear or read.  It's mind boggling how much misinformation is out there.  To see so many media outlets take that p*ta story and run with it without having fact checkers validate the story made me very wary of 'the media' in general.  

And while we're on the media, why is there so much of it about J-Lo, Benlo, Jacko and ... Paris Hilton?  Do people really care about this stuff or is it just being forced on us by the almighty entertainment media culture?

[CFCF]

Pamela,
   I began seriously doubting every news story back in the 70's. A San Diego newspapaer ran a story about my mom, who used to put on the International Quilt Exhibit. She was holding up the winning quilt from out of state and talking about the need for recognition of fine craftsmanship and the need to have quilting recognized as an artform for women, and talking about her new program for training master quilters and quilt judges. What came out in the story was that she was holding up her quilt, that she had made, that she put on the quilt show, and was the judge,  and that she won. It took her a long time to regain her credibility after that story. Take them all with a grain of salt. I was there when she was interviewed. The journalists seem to write what they want, not the facts.

[Jan]

I BELIEVE THE MUSIC INDUSTRY AND PUNDITS ARE STARTING TO GET THE IDEA.
THE GROUNDSWELL FOR CLAY DUE TO HIS TOP OF THE CHARTS ALBUM AND HIS AWARDS PLUS ALL OF THE GUEST APPEARANCES ARE BEING SUBTLEY NOTED.
AFTER HE WINS A COUPLE MORE AWARDS IN 2004 THERE WILL BE NO IGNORING HIM AFTER THAT!
I,LL BET ON IT!!!!!!!

JAN

[ClayBLuv]

Wonderfully said, Pamela, as always.  I guess I would classify myself as a pretty quiet fan; I would be too shy to even hold a sign at a concert.  I just might be the last person on earth to sling myself across the hood of Clay's limo.  But it does not mean that I adore him any less.  If I met Clay, I would like to shake his hand, thank him for the beautiful music/ inspiration, and I would tell him how much I appreciate the work(s) that he is doing.  I might even pass on the autograph or picture thing; that kind of stuff means very little to me.  The memory of meeting my "idol" and being able to let him know how much he is appreciated and loved, for himself and what he does, would be enough for me.  I would want him to walk away from his performance knowing that he accomplished what he set out to do - please the fans.  It is as important for Clay to feel good as it is for us, the fans, to feel good.  Clay Aiken has my heart forever.  There never has been or ever will be another performer that will touch me the way that Clay Aiken has.  He is "Solitaire"......he stands alone.  His voice is stunning and immaculate, and I like his personna.  I am glad that I had the chance to experience Clay Mania (I'm too young for Elvis and the Beatles).  Its FUN!   :D I can't put my finger on, just what it is that makes me love you, Clay....it is just the "way" it is.

[trichlemmon]

Pamela,

After reading your article I realized how to put into words why I love him so much...He makes you feel good...Not much music out there these days that make you feel good. Some of his christian music can make you change your ways...it has me...

Patricia

[quynn]

This is my 1st time to the soap box thread.  I've enjoyed reading everyone's comments & responses about why we are Clay's fans.

Personally I really don't think it necessary that I meet Clay.  I would be so happy just to have the opportunity so see him perform and continue to support his music career.

The Clay phenomenom has give me the opportunity to actually relate to real people who are inspired by the same things I am inspired by in an individual:  integrity, humility, grace, thoughtfulness, selflessness, et.  I have never found a real connection with real people like this before.  So many people are just out in the world trying to survive, looking out for #1 and doing so without a care as to how it effects the next person.  

I thinks with the help of the media, society has gotten so very mean to each other.  It's evident every time you turn on the TV.  Most TV reality shows are about pitting people against each other and labeling.  Comedians aren't funny unless they are putting someone down.  Music isn't good unless it's degrading an individual or group or full of sex, etc.  The majority of the news is negative and full of scandal.  This is what has been feeding society for so so long.

Where do Clay and his fans fit into this negative cesspool?  Well, I think Clay's appeal is what brings his fans TOGETHER in an attempt to clear this awful negativity from society and it's not and easy job.  Clay's appeal is his fan's ability to band TOGETHER to fight for what's good in the world.  (What makes us all feel good).  It's a huge battle as we've all experienced over the past several months fighting the negative Clay publicity and battling those around us who think we're nuts for standing by Clay.  I know we can continue with HOPE for UNITY in a LOVING world.  We can do it TOGETHER.

Thanks to all of you fo allowing me to be a part of the Claymaniacs.  It's truly been an honor to be a part of this FAMILY.

[CFCF]

Nicely said

[ANGELA]

guynn,
What you said is soooo true----I REALLY THINK YOU HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD!

ANGELA

[ClayBLuv]

Guynn:

Right on - you really did hit the nail on the head!  Very well said and so very true.  I am really proud and honoured to be part of this "family" too.  It makes me feel good to know that there is still a lot of good left in this complex world.  We came together because of a beautiful man named Clay. May we always stay connected in spirit to him and each other.  :D

[ANGELA]

Guynn:

Right on - you really did hit the nail on the head!  Very well said and so very true.  I am really proud and honoured to be part of this "family" too.  It makes me feel good to know that there is still a lot of good left in this complex world.  We came together because of a beautiful man named Clay. May we always stay connected in spirit to him and each other.  :D

YOU SAID IT CLAYBLUV, ISN'T IT SO NICE THAT CLAY GOT A BUNCH OF STRANGERS  AND PULLED THEM TOGETHER TO CARRY ON HIS BEAUTIFUL  SPIRIT OF LOVE & COMPASSION.  HE HAS SHOWN THIS TO ALL OF US.  
YES YOU ARE RIGHT,  EVERYONE ON THIS SITE FEELS  LIKE FAMILY--IT FEELS LIKE HOME.  

THIS SOUNDS SILLY,  BUT CLAY MAKES ME WANT TO BE AN EVEN  BETTER PERSON.

THERE WAS A TIME I FELT THIS WORLD WAS GOING MORALLY BANKRUPT---THEN CAME CLAY AND HE PULLED ALL THE GOODNESS OUT OF HIS HEART AND JUST SPREAD IT ALL AROUND.  
HE MADE ALL THE GOOD AND LOVE SURFACE TO THE TOP.

ANGELA

[Pamela]

THIS SOUNDS SILLY,  BUT CLAY MAKES ME WANT TO BE AN EVEN  BETTER PERSON.

There is nothing silly about that, not at all.  I think it's beautiful.