Dianne Austin: Reading Between the Lines

Reading Between the Lines (Another Writer’s Reflections)
By Dianne Austin

July 17, 2005 TV Guide Article entitled “Clay at a Crossroads”.

It is a piece that is rocking the Clay Nation. It certainly rattled me a bit. My reaction? Honestly, upon first reading, my overriding emotions were pain and puzzlement. Pain for him, pain for us, and puzzlement over why the commentary had taken the route it did. Why now, when it seems like a time for a more positive and enthusiastic Clay who is about to take off on this tour? Am I being selfish? I know “up” is how we feel at the prospect of his being onstage again—I guess it was a disappointment to find that he isn’t feeling exactly the same way. (Maybe he is excited, but it didn’t come across in the article.)

How did my thoughts proceed from there? Call me a dreamer, but I wish the interviewer had been me. Maybe it’s naiveté that caused me to think: if I had been the one to talk to him, if it had just been my turn to write about this phase of his life, I could have steered things in a different direction. Not to say that the same truths wouldn’t have been told, but perhaps the overall tone and feel of the article would have had a different effect.

Instead, I felt like we were forced to read between the lines to settle too many burning questions about things that were left unsaid; statements Clay made that could’ve been pursued and clarified.

I believe it is the writer’s responsibility to determine the general tone and theme of the article. Sure, Clay himself may have been adamant about the topics he wanted to cover, but it is usually the writer’s decision how the message comes across. The key is the way in which they link all things said—how they embellish, what they choose to leave out, and what they accentuate from the interview. Perhaps Clay was feeling down, discouraged or particularly reflective that day, and the mood affected his words. Maybe the magazine insisted it have a more negative and somewhat mysterious slant. Either way, I still believe the writer can and does have the ultimate control over the essence of the message that is conveyed.

So, with that in mind, here is how I would have done it if I had been given the coveted experience of penning Clay Aiken’s thoughts on love, work, fans and Hollywood.

If it had been me, I would not have started that way. The first sentence of any piece is always the hook; that which sets the tone. It was definitely an interesting and effective hook because it did set the tone for the rest of the article. But the bait we were given was not representative of Aiken; it was negative, ambiguous, and it felt a little manipulative. “Idle time is the devil’s playground.” The reference bothered me.

If I had been given the job, I would perhaps have grabbed the reader with a more positive lure, and then I would have navigated Clay through other waters.

There would have been some sentences written to explain and to buffer. There might have been some thoughts for the reader to ponder about why he’s been pondering the things he has—why he feels so strongly about the “Hollywood scene.” Coming back to his new home in Southern California was probably a rude awakening after UNICEF. This parallel is not made or mentioned. Instead, we’re led to believe that he’s restless and disgruntled simply because he’s been resting and vacationing.

I would have pressed Clay to go into more detail about his upcoming tour and what he derives from performing onstage. I would’ve dwelled on what he gets back from giving so much joy—all the positives that come from that.

I would not have given Clay the opportunity to linger on painful personal issues, understanding that he is the kind of man who is an open book, who actually gets relief from venting through the written word. I would tell him, off the record, gently and tactfully, that his audience will accept all the information he wants to give about what he struggles with and goes through in his heart and mind—they love him that much. But, after all is said and done, it does no good to press those points—no good for us, because we only worry and fret—no real good for him, because true therapy does not exist in a non-reciprocal situation.

And just as an aside—agoraphobia strikes a lot of people at various times of life. The fact that he suffers may be understandable, considering the huge turn around he’s done in the past two years. But the roots of the phobia can exist before the symptoms show up.

Maybe Clay doesn’t know it yet, but the best way to come to terms with our personal demons (and we all have them) is to find someone to trust and respect who will help him make some realizations about the troublesome areas of his life. Of course it seems that at this point, trusting is the tricky part for Clay. Just speaking to the wind, or in this case, a staff writer for TV Guide will give only temporary asylum. But a person who can help him figure out how to cope, jump the hurdles and get over the bump in the road that is preventing him from achieving personal happiness—that is where he needs to take the frustrations and the angst he’s feeling. Just unloading the baggage is not enough; the essential part is the work that comes with digging down deep, letting go, and getting feedback from another individual.

If I had interviewed this mighty but fragile man, I would have asked him to speak about the two trips that undoubtedly had life-altering consequences for him. I would have indicated that I thought these events could have been so pervasive for him. . . that it is not only understandable, but also inevitable, that he feels he could be at a crossroads with his life. I would then prompt him, and let him fly with what he saw and felt there. I would have encouraged him to talk about what he hopes to continue to do in those areas.

Because it is obvious that Clay has passion when it comes to his work with these efforts, and although he knows how large the challenge is, I don’t feel he is cowed by it. I believe that for whatever reason, he feels empowered to accept a role he is destined to fill with the work that he is inspired to do. I would have asked questions that might have gotten him fired up about it all over again, because it seems that when he concentrates on the bigger picture, he forgets about the inane, petty details that he (for now at least) endures with the Hollywood scene.

Which brings me to the point in the article that was definitely a sore one for me. I would have asked, “Which do you mean Clay—Hollywood, L.A., or the entertainment business?

Hollywood is mentioned first. Later, negative things seem to be lumped into the larger area of “L.A.” If it had been me, I would have pressed him on this. I would have asked more questions and specified to a fault, because when a particular place is marked as if it was hell by someone we hold in high esteem, the people who have anything at all to do with that place feel branded and inferior.

I will not have you read between the lines here. My feelings were hurt by Clay Aiken. To say that Los Angeles is a bad place is to imply that the people who live there are all bad, or at least, not as good as others who live elsewhere. I happen to live in the greater Los Angeles metropolitan area.

To say that Hollywood (which some regard as “Tinsel Town”) is a bad place, well we’re running the risk of offending again, but we’re getting closer to what I believe Clay really means.

I would have asked if he was really referring to a large contingent of people within the entertainment business in the Hollywood area who are more concerned with getting ahead in their career and with their “outsides”, as Clay puts it, than they are with the deeper considerations of life. I would have asked him if indeed he was referring to a group of people that, because they have lost their way in this world they have become caught up more with superficial things. These kinds of people are surely the ones he’s speaking of, and some that he probably has to deal with a lot while living in L.A. and making his way in the business.

I may have also pointed out that people like this can be found anywhere really, but that there may be a heavy concentration of “shallow” personalities on the West Coast because of the business that has always, and will always, intensify these kinds of characteristics in people. I would have had him think back to some times in school when he may have run into someone like this even in a place like Raleigh, NC.

And if I had been the one to look into those eyes and hear him say that he still hasn’t found the one, that he doesn’t feel the inclination to want to look for love out here on the West Coast while working in this business overrun with shallow types (causing him to feel a certain loneliness and yearning) I would understand and commiserate with him.

At times, I’m sure he feels like he is walking through an emotional wasteland. So often, I believe Clay feels that everyone is out to grab a piece of him simply for what he can do for them, what they can take from him. It must be horrible to ask yourself everyday if the people you spend your time with really care for the person you are and not the person they imagine you to be. So if he would like to wait to look for his true love, I wouldn’t blame him for a moment.

But what I’d ask or maybe expect him to do is to not lose sight of the fact that it is still possible to find what he’s looking for in the least likely place on earth—the place he is in right now. And the only way that can happen is if he remembers the ability he once had to let people in. It’s important to let down that guard and begin to trust again, even as he walks amidst the wolves. Because being “jaded” at his age and stage of the game will prevent him from recognizing his heart’s desire, even if it’s looking him right in the eye.

Would I then have published the details of such a discussion? Only what he would want the public to know, of course. But leading, discussing, and even exchanging is part of the job of the experienced interviewer, and interpreting the essence of the interview is the second part of the job. I would have reported what he told me, but I would have also interpreted what I heard him say. I would have edited our conversation with discretion, sensitivity, and then added my own commentary to clarify and transition.

The reader would not have had to read between the lines.

But then, I am a fan of his—I am invested, and I feel a little like I’ve been on this journey with him. I realize there are people who would say then that my feelings would color the piece. And they probably would.

So, if attitude and emotion color things, then maybe I would have taken some of the blue out (where it may not have existed to begin with).

Instead, without even realizing it, I might have added a rosier glow to the commentary, and perhaps for all concerned, that would have been better.
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Copyright 2005 by Dianne Austin. Printed with the permission of the writer.

Editor: Michelle Arce